“Both abundance and lack [of abundance] exist simultaneously in our lives, as parallel realities. It is always our conscious choice which secret garden we will tend." - Sarah Ban Breathnach

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Because He Loves Me!

OK -- I've had a rough week, and boy did my house show it! It was looking definitely worse for the wear. Tuesday, I had my children stay home from school to protest the CTA donating $1.2 million to the no on prop 8 campaign. I thought it would be a great time to rally them together to catch up on their chores.

I then went to Albertson's "going out of business" sale and to Wal-Mart to pick up Halloween costumes. Ooops! Did me in! I was an exhausted zombie after that.

I asked my oldest daughter (she's 17) to spearhead the "Home Blessing Hour" (thank you FlyLady). Nothing. I asked again. Nothing. A third time? Nothing. Finally, I said, "OK, guys, just get your own jobs done today." Nothing.

My poor husband comes home and it looks like a bomb had gone off. Bags of groceries from Albertson's were still scattered all over the living room floor. Every room in the house was a mess. Did he say anything about the mess? No -- but he definitely gave the kids an earful about how they had treated me when I was feeling so terrible.

Yesterday (Wednesday), I covered at the store for my husband to give him a day off. It was a lovely, slow day. It paced itself -- only three customers all day, well spaced breaks in between, few tasks that needed attention. I was really proud that I was able to make it through the day.

When I got home, if you know my husband, you can already guess what I found -- A clean home!!! Yes, the living room was clean AND vacuumed, the kitchen was clean, the loft was clean AND vacuumed -- even the bathrooms smelled better! And his very own special gift to me -- he cleaned out the pantry to make room for all that food I had just bought at Albertson's.

I know it was a labor of love. I also recognized what a blessing it is too have two parents in a family! So often, I feel like I am failing my children. I know that they needed a parent who was strong enough to insist they get their work done. I couldn't do it all week. But when Dad's big booming voice let them know this was not a debate and there would be no room for procrastination, they jumped up and got to work. More than I needed my house clean, my kids needed a parent to be strict and expect more from them.

For the past 15 1/2 years, my husband has worked his tail off so I could be a stay at home mom. That blessing is even more important to me now, while I have CFS. I know I have bad days. I know there are days when I can't be a "good" mom. But, I'm here. At least I can be a mom.