“Both abundance and lack [of abundance] exist simultaneously in our lives, as parallel realities. It is always our conscious choice which secret garden we will tend." - Sarah Ban Breathnach

Saturday, February 12, 2011

It's Here!

The new medication finally arrived today...and I panicked!  After all my determination and tenacity, the moment of truth has arrived.  I am not ignorant of the risks involved.  And I find myself asking, Am I really that bad?  Do I really want to do this?

I mean, I've adjusted to my situation.  I've got so much help.  And things are better here; without the stairs, I'm finding that I'm bouncing back much more quickly.  Of course, "back" means just getting out of bed and able to take a shower.  I'm still housebound.  I still can't get out and visit with friends.  I still can't go to church.

It's time.  It's time to do this for me, to do this for my family, to do this for everyone out there suffering with no hope.  Maybe I can be a piece of the puzzle.  Maybe I can be a part of finding answers, answers that have been so elusive for so long -- long before I first became sick.

And maybe, just maybe, I'll get better.


Elaine said...

Oh Shelli,
I've been wondering about you and the meds... Wondering what you would decide.

I hope and pray you will "get better". And it would be fantastic if you were indeed a part of this puzzle we only have some of the pieces of and no picture to follow at all....

Please keep us posted as often as possible on how you are feeling. As I told you before, my doc is really interested in this as he believes that viruses are a big part of the puzzle.

Glad that not having stairs is helping you some too. We don't have any.

Thanks for having the courage to do this!

Many blessings to you.


Stacy said...

Shelli, you seem to have made up your mind, and by golly, I wish you well. "Bon courage," as they say in France. (Or, "Be of good courage," as they said in the Bible.) I admire your willingness to try. Let us know if you need anything from those of us in cyberspace - from research to prayer. Really.

Renee said...

Thinking and praying for you as you begin this new treatment plan, Shelli. You are keeping your focus on getting better.....eyes ahead....and it sounds like you have made up your mind to walk down this path. I pray it will be RIGHT for you..I pray that it opens the door to your healing and I pray it brings healing and strength swiftly!
Keep us informed...are you going to keep a journal about this?

Anonymous said...

I look forward to hearing about this important, courageous journey you are on, Shelli. I pray for good results! Did you decide to upgrade your health insurance? I know you've got lots of money riding on this experiment!!

What is the Rx called? What do the pills look like? How many mgs. and how many times a day do you take it?

Don't feel you have to answer those questions here in the comments! Maybe you can post about these things...